While others would say that the search for your true self takes place in your teen years, I lean on to the concept that we are continuously searching for that so-called true self for all of our lifetime. Teenage years are only the beginning of that long journey. The process of defining yourself is something that you would go through for years and years and it only ends when your lungs are out of oxygen to pump. I always believe that people change, and they change for many many times during their lifetime on Earth. You cannot simply expect a cheerful and kind girl to grow into a cheerful and kind woman as well. How people change themselves is highly affected by the things they face in life, their surroundings and how they cope with all of that.
It does not always take a dramatic or life-wrecking tragedy to turn one from white to a complete dark. Bits of little memories can do exactly the same. One does not have to experience a horrifying experience like physical or sexual abuse or a deep lost of a very significant person in his life in order to be completely changed. The little pieces of bitter memories that stay in that dark room in the corner of the brain are obviously capable of making a person turn into someone very different. In other words, those scars are as deadly as a wound from a bullet shot right through the brain. I believe that we choose our own memories, and we may choose different memories to bring up to the surface every time we open that dark little corner room. When we choose the good memories, we become a happier person, and when we choose the bad ones, we are as as hurt as a shot bird or as angry as a furiously roaring lion knowing his area is being trespassed.
No one was born evil, and even if one turns into an evil person, no one is an evil all the time.So don't trust anyone who says that he is a full-time cold blood. Everyone is a part-time evil, part-time angel, swinging like a pendulum. So don't think too hard when it comes to re-defining yourself. It will change again soon. One's character is something that is written with a pencil, not a pen. The best thing we can do is to keep the bad one up for a short time and the good one longer.